I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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