WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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