We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
