Just took my morning after pill in the library
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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