At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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