We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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