I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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