Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
only you would photoshop your dick
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
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