if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
