i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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