Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Randomize