Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
