just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Randomize
