there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize