please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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