I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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