Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
