3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
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He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
This toilet bowl is my home.
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