also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
