dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize