But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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