I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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