he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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