They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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