she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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