Im at strip club and am horny
youre lurking in front of me
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
