We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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