Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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