you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
