he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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