thus making me awesome and them whores
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
home. puking in laundry basket.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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