in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Randomize