Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize