We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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