are you still at the devil's house?
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Randomize
