so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Girls should come with a carfax report
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
