we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
