hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
