I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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