your room smells of hookers.
And success
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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