is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
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Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
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I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.