i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
