grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
