The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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