Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
