they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
