dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You've changed since you got that strap on
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
