In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
