so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
