You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Randomize
