Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
